he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Randomize
