It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
My apartment stinks of burning failure
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize