If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize
