People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
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I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize