a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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