I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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