130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
