One girl and one boy is just not enough.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
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