what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
did i walk over a car last night?
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Randomize
