That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
At least life still wants to fuck me.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
