the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Bring me that man meat
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
