real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
