Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
