But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
