is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Randomize