it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
