dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
