remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
