dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Randomize
