Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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