Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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