i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
