sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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