Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
