...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
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