Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
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