so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
