It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
porn star boner night. come get it.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Randomize
