there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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