Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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