do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
