Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
