Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
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