You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
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