Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
