My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Randomize
