I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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