your thong is hanging out like whoa
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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