hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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