Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
