her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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