..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
