Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
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