I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
