have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
