Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
