google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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