I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
