Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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