how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
