Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Randomize
